Natalya

i really really really want to go dancing.

i spent this last weekend with my friend natalya, such a beautiful young lady.

it was a wonderful day and a half.

we talked a lot.

i haven't had that good of fellowship with anyone my age before.

she is lovely and we have so much in common.

i've never known anyone that has wanted to know me as i much as i've wanted to know them.

we identify so deeply in heart and spirit.

could this be true friendship?

~

this weekend i learned:

1.) that i am BLESSED.

with love. and an ability to make myself vulnerable.

and in this discovered the complete meaning of romans 5:5

"the love of God has been spread abroad in our hearts by the holy spirit."

2.) love is spontaneous.

and it has sprung up in amazing ways in the last 7 months.

in fellowship.

at work.

in my home.

even to people across the country.

3.) about myself, i like to think big abstract thoughts.

and that's ok.

i've found a balance of concrete and abstract.

i've become more sure that God has a purpose for that.

4.) i am not to judge.

it is the Lord's to judge.

there is no condemnation in love.

5.) i am not in control.

i can say words. i can give hugs. i can serve.

but no matter what i say or do, only God can prepare the soils of peoples' hearts.

how frustrating this is when you want someone to be free.

but they are not ready to let go.

how frustrating when no matter how much truth you speak

they will not see until their eyes are opened.

and i cannot open eyes alone.

what else can i do but depend.

"all to Jesus, i surrender."

~

yes, Natalya, the sweet sweet soul.

the seeds of new discoveries were planted in her presence.

and that would not have been possible without her smile.

or her gracious ear.

we will go dancing soon.



"I tell you the truth, anyone who has faith in me will do what I have been doing. He will do even greater things than these" John 14:12